Sarah Bartholomew-Fisher, LCSW
(she/her)
Sarah's View of Therapy
Sarah works with you
Sarah works with children, adults, and parents, practicing cultural humility and providing trauma informed care. Sarah has extensive experience and training working with survivors of domestic violence, sexual assaults, child abuse, and/or other traumas. She works with individuals from the LGBT+ community who may be struggling with issues related: self acceptance, rejection from family or loved ones, transitioning, marriage, having children, etc. Sarah also works with parents of children in the LGBT+ community who want to learn how to best support and understand what their child is going through.
Sarah works with each person as an individual. She will spend time with you to create a treatment plan that works for you, taking into account your strengths, abilities, and preferences. Your treatment plan is yours and can be changed to work on your
needs. Sarah has been trained in many different forms of therapy and would love the opportunity to work with you. View therapeutic services here.
Trauma
Trauma Informed Therapy
Sarah is a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional and practices Trauma Informed Therapy. This means that Sarah is aware of the many ways that traumas, recent or old, can impact a person's life. The effects of trauma can look like many other mental health diagnoses and people can often be misdiagnosed with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, or Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Generalized Anxiety, or Depression.
People can react to traumatic situations in many different ways, both during the traumatic event and after. Trauma can manifest emotionally, behaviorally, and physically in different individuals and there is no right or wrong way to feel or deal with a trauma. Although there are some coping skills that are healthier or unhealthier in the long term, it is important to understand that surviving a trauma doesn't just mean surviving the traumatic event. Many people who have experienced traumas struggle with the event day to day, sometimes long after the trauma took place. Sarah understands this and works with individuals at their pace to assist with developing new healthy coping habits, while not judging current coping methods.
Why did I do that?
Many people feel guilty or ashamed about how they reacted during the traumatic event. Just as there are many ways that people are affected by a trauma, there are many ways that people act during or directly after a trauma. Fight or Flight are the two most commonly talked about responses during a traumatic event. People who ran can feel guilty that they fled, feel that they should have stood up for themselves, or maybe ran leaving others behind. People who fought can think that they should have fought harder, or questioned that maybe had they not fought they wouldn't have gotten as hurt. Freezing is also a common reaction during a traumatic event that is not as talked about. People who freeze can feel guilty for not having fought or run and confused about why they didn't do more. Fight, Flight, and Freeze are all evolutionally engrained responses to traumatic events. No matter how you reacted during the event, your body made that choice to keep you safe.
There is no one way that a person should act after a traumatic event. Sarah has met many different individuals in the hospital after they were sexually assaulted. No two people had the same reaction. Some people were angry and yelling, some were scared, feeling that they were still in danger, some cried quietly, some cried loudly, some joked, smiled, and laughed. None of those reactions are the wrong reaction. None of those responses are the wrong responses. None of these make the trauma any more or less valid and no one should be made to feel as though it does. Unfortunately, not everyone understands this and hurtful things can be said by loved ones, doctors, or police.
Am I crazy?
Many people who have experienced trauma feel like they are going crazy. Sometimes they have been told they are crazy and that they need to get over it, and sometimes it is because they don't understand what is happening to them. People often fell anxious and like they are in danger even when in safe environments. Some people feel like they are living the traumatic experience again, some people feel nauseated or panicked when they hear a certain sound, smell something, even seeing a certain color. Some people turn off their anxiety filter and take risks that they would not have previously taken. Some people feel completely disengaged from friends, family, work, and the world. They have difficulty feeling joy.
A trauma can change the way your brain functions, and the differences in brains that have experienced a trauma can even be seen on brain imaging. However, this does not mean that things will stay this way. With therapy the brain can be rewired to function normally again.
Sarah utilizes evidence-based therapeutic interventions to help individuals create change.
This doesn't happen to people like me
Sexual assault and domestic violence happen across all socioeconomic classes, races, genders, ages, religions. Both of these crimes are about power and control. It is about the person who is committing these crimes (perpetrator) and the decisions that they make. They choose actions that hurt other people. Perpetrators often try to make the people they are hurting feel like it is their fault. There is nothing that anyone can do that would make it OK for someone to put their hands on someone else.
Although it can happen to anyone, there are populations that are more at risk including children, elderly, individuals with disabilities, sex workers, LGBT+ individuals, and undocumented individuals. These individuals are often targeted because it is harder for them to seek help and/ or they can be intimidated due to their status. Perpetrators take advantage of and use it to gain power.
Sarah works with all survivors of sexual assault. Sarah practices Person Centered Therapy with cultural humility. This means that Sarah works with each individual as a unique individual. She understands that you can never understand any one person from any background just because you have met or worked with someone else from that background. Each family and person has their own experiences and culture that they bring into the sessions and are important to who they are as a person. Sarah believes that everyone has value and should be treated with dignity and respect.
Why didn't my child tell me?
Parents of children who have been victims of sexual assault or ongoing child abuse often feel guilty for not having known. They question why their child didn't tell them. They question why they didn't see it was happening. Children are most often victimized by individuals that are a trusted friend of the family (perpetrators). Perpetrators will go through a grooming process with both the family and the child, earning everyone's trust. They will often trick or scare children into keeping the abuse a secret. Children can be made to feel that they will get in trouble if they tell, that their parents, sibling, or pet will be killed if they tell, that their parent's will go to jail if they tell, or, due to grooming, the child may even want to protect the perpetrator as it is someone they love and trust.
Sarah works with children who have sexually assaulted or who have experienced child abuse. Sarah also works with parents of survivors of sexual assault.
Cultural Humility
Sarah practices with cultural humility and therefor is comfortable working with people from many different cultures and backgrounds. Sarah is passionate about equality and equity and works with marginalize and oppressed individuals. Sarah believes that all individuals deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. All humans are deserving of love. The choices we have made in the past do not define who we are today. Sarah hopes to help all the people she works with accept who they are, love who they are, embrace their power, and be the best versions of themselves, as defined by themselves, because society doesn't get to tell us who we are!
Black
Atheist
Hindu
Hispanic
Transgender
Thirdgender
Blended Family
Muslim
Latinx
Gender
Orthodox
Puerto Rican
Transitioning
Pacific Islander
Intersex
Gay
Straight
Only Child
American
You identify You
Native Hawaiian
Male
Queer
Urban
Teen Mom
Homeowner
Stepdaughter
Youngest Middle Child
Renter
Sikh
Asexual
Bisexual
Alaska Natives
Middle Child
African American
Landlord
Pre-op
Buddhist
Homeless
Post-op
Person of Color
Youngest Brother
Pansexual
Asian
Employee
Wealthy
Questioning
Gender fluid
Divorced Parents
Foster Child
Aunt
Rural
Agnostic
Gender identity
Stepbrother
Native American
Indigenous
White
Stepsister
Suburban
Oldest Sister
Androgynous
Oldest Middle Child
Two-Spirit
Employer
Stepson
Jewish
Lesbian
Youngest Sister
Dual Citizenship
Biracial
Uncle
Christian
Adopted
Prejudice
Oldest Brother
Gender expression
Intersectionality
Ally
Female
Cisgender
Transsexual
Undocumented
Separated Parents
Two Moms
Race
Misogyny
Ethnicity
Marginalized
Homophobia
Institutional Oppression
Genderqueer
Poor
Two Dads
Mexican
Non-binary
Foster Sibling
Non-conforming
LGBT+ Community*
The LGBT community is different than other marginalized communities because although our gender identity and sexual orientation are are part of how we are born, our families generally don't share the same identity. Other minority groups often have family that they are able to look towards for support and guidance about how to navigate in our world. The LGBT community often doesn't have a biological family member that they can turn to.
Religion and Society
Many LGBT individuals have been hurt by negative messages that they have been fed through the religion they were raised in or from society. It can be so hard to overcome these negative messages that can be internalize without even knowing. So many individuals have negative self esteem due to the false narrative they have been fed about their lives. Learning to form your own beliefs and values based on critical examination of your thoughts and feelings allows individuals to be who they truly want to be. Religion can be a source of power and comfort for some and for others it is best to be left to the side. Both are valid choices and the right choice is the one that leaves you feeling whole and satisfied.
At Risk
Society is not supporting our LGBT members. These individuals are at greater risk for homelessness, physical assaults, sexual assaults, discrimination in school, workplace, housing, health care, family planning agencies, and negative interactions with police. All of these negatively impact their physical, mental, economic, and spiritual well being. It leads to higher rates of truancy, suicide, drug and alcohol abuse, and poverty.
Family
Family is so important in the LGBT community, but often LGBT youth are rejected or shamed by their biological families. It is so important and affirming when an individual is accepted by the people who they love. Unfortunately LGBT youth is not always accepted for who they are by their family. In these cases and in others families are chosen families. Individuals who love you for who you are and will support you through all life has to offer.
Parents
It can be hard as a parent finding out that your child may not have the life that you dreamed of for them when they are born. It can be hard to remember that the main thing you want for your child when they are born is for them to be happy. Many parents go through a grieving process when they find out that they may not have a biologically related grandbaby. Many parents grieve the death of the daughter or son, even as they gain a son or a daughter. This change can be hard for parents, but it is important to remember that it is much harder for your child, and your reaction will greatly impact the way your child thinks about themselves. Therapy can be helpful for parents so that they can process their feelings without causing harm to their children.
*LGBT+
A quick note about the use of LGBT+ instead of LGBTQ+ or any variation of that. Sarah is aware that there are so many identifiers and labels and wants to be inclusive, she does not want to forget anyone or make anyone feel unseen. Some people reject labels, and that is great for them. Some people find so much power and comfort in finding where they fit, a label that finally feels right. So let Sarah know what labels you do or don't like and she will honor and respect you as a whole.